I ALMOST DIED LAST WEEK. IT CHANGES YOUR PERSPECTIVE A LITTLE BIT...
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE, THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN IT...
THE PAIN WAS MERCILESS AND UNBEARABLE.
THURSDAY MORNING I WOKE UP EARLY. HAVING RECOVERED FROM A SINUS COLD THAT MORNING. I WOKE UP CLEAR AND NOT A SIGN OF TROUBLE... AT FIRST...
IT WAS DARK AND EVERYONE WAS ASLEEP... AND I WAS REFRESHED AND RENEWED.... SO I THOUGHT I WOULD CHECK MY EMAIL FOR A FEW MOMENTS BEFORE GOING BACK TO SLEEP... THE WEEKEND WAS STARTING FOR ME AS I WAS SCHEDULED OFF FOR A COUPLE DAYS AND SO... TIME TO SORT THE SPAM...
AFTER A BIT OF READING AND DELETING SPAM, IT WAS ONTO ANCESTRY AT SOME POINT TO DO SOME RESEARCH... AND THEN EVENTUALLY AT SOME POINT, IT STARTED, A LITTLE INDIGESTION PERHAPS... BUT IT GOT WORSE RAPIDLY... I DROPPED SOME ALKA SELTZER LIKE LAST TIME, BUT BY THEN THE PAIN WAS TOO MUCH AND I NEVER GOT THEM BOTH DOWN....
BEFORE LONG I WAS PACING THE FLOOR AND TRYING TO START A BOWEL MOVEMENT THAT WOULD NOT COME FOR DAYS.... I THOUGHT IT WAS ANOTHER KIDNEY STONE AND TRIED TO GET SOME WATER AT SOME POINT... I WENT FOR THE BOTTLE I HAD USED TO PREP A CUP OF ALKA SELTZER WITH, BUT STARTED HURLING AND RAN BACK TO THE BATHROOM SINK TO KEEP FROM GOING ON THE FLOOR.... BUT I HAD BEEN SICK FOR A FEW DAYS AND HAD NOTHING ON MY STOMACH SO THE HURLING WAS EMPTY...
I TRIED SITTING STANDING WALKING LAYING DOWN NOTHING HELPED... HAD TO BE A KIDNEY STONE AGAIN.... SO I TRIED TO GO FOR WATER AGAIN BUT ENDED UP ON MY KNEES, BEGGING FOR MERCY....
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE, I MIGHT HAVE BLACKED OUT AND DIED....
IN THE PAST, WHEN THIS SORT OF THING WOULD HAPPEN IT WOULD EVENTUALLY LET UP AND I MIGHT PASS SOME GAS AND URINE AND A BOWEL MOVEMENT AND GET SOME SLEEP AND EVERYTHING WOULD BE BETTER LATER....
BUT THIS TIME, IT WAS DIFFERENT,... THIS TIME IT WAS NOT JUST A KIDNEY
STONE OR SOME INDIGESTION... RECENT INDIGESTIONS MAY HAVE BEEN WARNING SIGNS... BUT THIS TIME IT WAS NOT LETTING UP...
SWEAT WAS POURING OFF MY SKIN LIKE A WATER FOUNTAIN HAD BEEN TURNED ON INSIDE ME AND THE PAIN IN MY GUT WAS OFF THE CHARTS....
AT SOME POINT, MOM CALLED 911 BUT I COULD NOT MOVE... I KEPT TRYING TO FIND A COMFORT SPOT BUT THERE WAS NONE. I REMEMBERED FEELING LIKE THIS WHEN I GOT MY FIRST KIDNEY STONE AND SUFFERED FOR HOURS BEFORE I FINALLY LEARNED THAT I COULD HAVE STOPPED THE PAIN WITH A FEW CUPS OF WATER....
WHEN THE AMBULANCE CAME, THE QUESTIONS BEGAN....
NAME? DATE OF BIRTH? REALLY? NO WAY? ADDRESS? MEDICAL DOCTOR? MEDICAL HISTORY? ON AND ON AND ON... WHILE NO ONE WAS HELPING ME WITH THE POTENTIAL ALIEN ABOUT TO RIP THROUGH MY ABDOMEN.....
HOW COULD I BE EXPECTED TO THINK AND RESPOND TO QUESTIONS WHEN MY INSIDES FELT LIKE THEY WERE BEING CARVED UP BY FREDDY'S GLOVE.....
I TOOK THE AMBULANCE RIDE HOPING FOR SOMETHING TO EASE THE PAIN ON THE WAY... AND THEN A BUMPY RIDE ON AN ALREADY UPSET STOMACH TO THE HOSPITAL WHERE I SPENT THE REST OF THE MORNING HURTING AND PLANNING A WILL THAT I WOULD PROBABLY NOT GET TO WRITE.... ANYWAY, WHAT DID I HAVE TO LEAVE ANYONE? I WAS HOMELESS AND WORKING HARD LABOR TO PAY ALL MY MONEY TO BILLS AND COLLECTORS WHO WANTED MONEY I DIDNT HAVE FROM THE EIGHTIES THAT CITIBANK WOULD NOT LEAVE ALONE.... I WAS JUST A MINIMUM WAGE WORKER AGAIN.... AFTER ALL... AFTER SEVEN YEARS THE COMPANY STARTED PAYING EVERYONE THE SAME,... IN OTHER WORDS, I WAS BACK TO SQUARE ONE... MAKING THE SAME AS THE NEXT KID WHO COMES IN OFF THE STREET... IS THAT FAIR TO ANYONE?... AFTER ALL THE PLANT CLOSINGS AND TEMP JOBS... RIGHT BACK TO WHERE I STARTED... I COULD LITERALLY GET ANOTHER JOB TOMORROW WITH ANOTHER COMPANY AND MAKE MORE MONEY DAY ONE....
SORRY, DIFFERENT LINE OF THOUGHT.... WHERE WAS I? OH YES,.... IN THE ER WISHING TO DIE.... AND THEN SOME X RAYS.... AND SOME TESTS AND A URINE SAMPLE AND SOME TESTS AND SOME MORE TESTS AND SOME INTRODUCTIONS AND SOME MORE QUESTIONS....
AND AT SOME POINT, FINALLY.... AN ANGEL OF MERCY IN SOME BLUE SCRUBS WITH A NEEDLE FULL OF SLEEP... I DONT KNOW WHAT SHE GAVE ME, BUT I DEFINITELY NEEDED MORE....
EVENTUALLY... I AWAKE TO A LESS PAINFUL WORLD AND TEST RESULTS....
PANCREATIS.... PANCREATITIS.... WHATEVER ITS CALLED AND SOME GALL STONES....
ENDED UP SHIPPING TO WINSTON AFTER DARK BUT STILL IN PAIN....
LIFE WAS STARTING TO LOOK LIKE A DISASTER MOVIE BY NOW WITH REAL PAIN SENSATIONS....
THE NIGHT WAS PRETTY MUCH THE SAME,... QUESTIONS AND INTROS AND TESTS AND BLOOD DRAWN AND NEEDLES... SO MANY NEEDLES.... I HATE NEEDLES BY THE WAY.... THE PAIN PILLS DIDNT HELP AT FIRST UNTIL THE MORPHINE CAME AND THEN THERE WAS A LOT MORE SLEEPING AND SO ON....
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE THAT MORNING I PROBABLY WOULD NOT BE HERE NOW... TO EVEN REFLECT ON THE NIGHTMARE THAT WAS LAST WEEK..... IF NOT FOR THE KINDNESS AND TRAINING OF A FEW DOZEN MEDICAL PERSONELL IN THE AMBULANCES AND HOSPITALS....
THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE OUT THERE WHO HAVE TO WORK THOUGH THE NIGHTS AND WEEKENDS AND HOLIDAYS TO KEEP THE REST OF THE WORLD GOING....
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE, THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN IT...
THE PAIN WAS MERCILESS AND UNBEARABLE.
THURSDAY MORNING I WOKE UP EARLY. HAVING RECOVERED FROM A SINUS COLD THAT MORNING. I WOKE UP CLEAR AND NOT A SIGN OF TROUBLE... AT FIRST...
IT WAS DARK AND EVERYONE WAS ASLEEP... AND I WAS REFRESHED AND RENEWED.... SO I THOUGHT I WOULD CHECK MY EMAIL FOR A FEW MOMENTS BEFORE GOING BACK TO SLEEP... THE WEEKEND WAS STARTING FOR ME AS I WAS SCHEDULED OFF FOR A COUPLE DAYS AND SO... TIME TO SORT THE SPAM...
AFTER A BIT OF READING AND DELETING SPAM, IT WAS ONTO ANCESTRY AT SOME POINT TO DO SOME RESEARCH... AND THEN EVENTUALLY AT SOME POINT, IT STARTED, A LITTLE INDIGESTION PERHAPS... BUT IT GOT WORSE RAPIDLY... I DROPPED SOME ALKA SELTZER LIKE LAST TIME, BUT BY THEN THE PAIN WAS TOO MUCH AND I NEVER GOT THEM BOTH DOWN....
BEFORE LONG I WAS PACING THE FLOOR AND TRYING TO START A BOWEL MOVEMENT THAT WOULD NOT COME FOR DAYS.... I THOUGHT IT WAS ANOTHER KIDNEY STONE AND TRIED TO GET SOME WATER AT SOME POINT... I WENT FOR THE BOTTLE I HAD USED TO PREP A CUP OF ALKA SELTZER WITH, BUT STARTED HURLING AND RAN BACK TO THE BATHROOM SINK TO KEEP FROM GOING ON THE FLOOR.... BUT I HAD BEEN SICK FOR A FEW DAYS AND HAD NOTHING ON MY STOMACH SO THE HURLING WAS EMPTY...
I TRIED SITTING STANDING WALKING LAYING DOWN NOTHING HELPED... HAD TO BE A KIDNEY STONE AGAIN.... SO I TRIED TO GO FOR WATER AGAIN BUT ENDED UP ON MY KNEES, BEGGING FOR MERCY....
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE, I MIGHT HAVE BLACKED OUT AND DIED....
IN THE PAST, WHEN THIS SORT OF THING WOULD HAPPEN IT WOULD EVENTUALLY LET UP AND I MIGHT PASS SOME GAS AND URINE AND A BOWEL MOVEMENT AND GET SOME SLEEP AND EVERYTHING WOULD BE BETTER LATER....
BUT THIS TIME, IT WAS DIFFERENT,... THIS TIME IT WAS NOT JUST A KIDNEY
STONE OR SOME INDIGESTION... RECENT INDIGESTIONS MAY HAVE BEEN WARNING SIGNS... BUT THIS TIME IT WAS NOT LETTING UP...
SWEAT WAS POURING OFF MY SKIN LIKE A WATER FOUNTAIN HAD BEEN TURNED ON INSIDE ME AND THE PAIN IN MY GUT WAS OFF THE CHARTS....
AT SOME POINT, MOM CALLED 911 BUT I COULD NOT MOVE... I KEPT TRYING TO FIND A COMFORT SPOT BUT THERE WAS NONE. I REMEMBERED FEELING LIKE THIS WHEN I GOT MY FIRST KIDNEY STONE AND SUFFERED FOR HOURS BEFORE I FINALLY LEARNED THAT I COULD HAVE STOPPED THE PAIN WITH A FEW CUPS OF WATER....
WHEN THE AMBULANCE CAME, THE QUESTIONS BEGAN....
NAME? DATE OF BIRTH? REALLY? NO WAY? ADDRESS? MEDICAL DOCTOR? MEDICAL HISTORY? ON AND ON AND ON... WHILE NO ONE WAS HELPING ME WITH THE POTENTIAL ALIEN ABOUT TO RIP THROUGH MY ABDOMEN.....
HOW COULD I BE EXPECTED TO THINK AND RESPOND TO QUESTIONS WHEN MY INSIDES FELT LIKE THEY WERE BEING CARVED UP BY FREDDY'S GLOVE.....
I TOOK THE AMBULANCE RIDE HOPING FOR SOMETHING TO EASE THE PAIN ON THE WAY... AND THEN A BUMPY RIDE ON AN ALREADY UPSET STOMACH TO THE HOSPITAL WHERE I SPENT THE REST OF THE MORNING HURTING AND PLANNING A WILL THAT I WOULD PROBABLY NOT GET TO WRITE.... ANYWAY, WHAT DID I HAVE TO LEAVE ANYONE? I WAS HOMELESS AND WORKING HARD LABOR TO PAY ALL MY MONEY TO BILLS AND COLLECTORS WHO WANTED MONEY I DIDNT HAVE FROM THE EIGHTIES THAT CITIBANK WOULD NOT LEAVE ALONE.... I WAS JUST A MINIMUM WAGE WORKER AGAIN.... AFTER ALL... AFTER SEVEN YEARS THE COMPANY STARTED PAYING EVERYONE THE SAME,... IN OTHER WORDS, I WAS BACK TO SQUARE ONE... MAKING THE SAME AS THE NEXT KID WHO COMES IN OFF THE STREET... IS THAT FAIR TO ANYONE?... AFTER ALL THE PLANT CLOSINGS AND TEMP JOBS... RIGHT BACK TO WHERE I STARTED... I COULD LITERALLY GET ANOTHER JOB TOMORROW WITH ANOTHER COMPANY AND MAKE MORE MONEY DAY ONE....
SORRY, DIFFERENT LINE OF THOUGHT.... WHERE WAS I? OH YES,.... IN THE ER WISHING TO DIE.... AND THEN SOME X RAYS.... AND SOME TESTS AND A URINE SAMPLE AND SOME TESTS AND SOME MORE TESTS AND SOME INTRODUCTIONS AND SOME MORE QUESTIONS....
AND AT SOME POINT, FINALLY.... AN ANGEL OF MERCY IN SOME BLUE SCRUBS WITH A NEEDLE FULL OF SLEEP... I DONT KNOW WHAT SHE GAVE ME, BUT I DEFINITELY NEEDED MORE....
EVENTUALLY... I AWAKE TO A LESS PAINFUL WORLD AND TEST RESULTS....
PANCREATIS.... PANCREATITIS.... WHATEVER ITS CALLED AND SOME GALL STONES....
ENDED UP SHIPPING TO WINSTON AFTER DARK BUT STILL IN PAIN....
LIFE WAS STARTING TO LOOK LIKE A DISASTER MOVIE BY NOW WITH REAL PAIN SENSATIONS....
THE NIGHT WAS PRETTY MUCH THE SAME,... QUESTIONS AND INTROS AND TESTS AND BLOOD DRAWN AND NEEDLES... SO MANY NEEDLES.... I HATE NEEDLES BY THE WAY.... THE PAIN PILLS DIDNT HELP AT FIRST UNTIL THE MORPHINE CAME AND THEN THERE WAS A LOT MORE SLEEPING AND SO ON....
IF I HAD BEEN ALONE THAT MORNING I PROBABLY WOULD NOT BE HERE NOW... TO EVEN REFLECT ON THE NIGHTMARE THAT WAS LAST WEEK..... IF NOT FOR THE KINDNESS AND TRAINING OF A FEW DOZEN MEDICAL PERSONELL IN THE AMBULANCES AND HOSPITALS....
THANK YOU TO ALL THOSE OUT THERE WHO HAVE TO WORK THOUGH THE NIGHTS AND WEEKENDS AND HOLIDAYS TO KEEP THE REST OF THE WORLD GOING....
